writings from the kitchen table: early weeks of Motherhood

my body grew a whole human and now i'm seeking ways to stay grounded and full

In true mother-of-a-newborn fashion, I started this post on Monday, finished it on Tuesday and will hopefully be posting it today, which is Thursday.

I’m sitting here at our unfinished banquette in my very sunny home kitchen sipping on a cup of mushroom coffee, topped with a splash of almond milk, after just having put my son down for his second nap of the morning. Or so I hope it will be a nap so I can somewhat gather my thoughts and myself before our next round of feeding and soothing begins. My brain still hasn’t quite figured out how I grew a human, birthed said human and have now spent the past 22 days as a caregiver to this new life. It has all been such an adjustment, being thrown into this stage—the fourth trimester. Nothing can prepare you for this journey. No book, no Instagram influencer, no advice from a fellow mom/parent.

We’ve had good days and bad days, many intense moments and really beautiful, sweet awe filled moments too.

And while I have been “enjoying every moment” of this experience, the age old bit of advice I’ve heard from every human I’ve come into contact with since entering this chapter, I’ve also been eager and ready for just a tiny bit of freedom as having a teeny, little newborn attached to me 24/7 isn’t something I’ve quite adjusted to just yet, and I honestly don’t know if I ever will. I can honestly admit that I am extremely eager to just have a little breathing room in my day so I can feel somewhat connected to my old self, whoever she may be. I do miss my daily workouts and long, long walks. I miss being able to cook meals and get creative in the kitchen. I miss being able to have a task list and actually accomplish things on that list.

Just a bit of breathing room is all I need. And I’m grateful for a partner who will adjust his schedule to ensure I get a short workout in on a semi-regular basis and ensures I’m fed and watered throughout the day, but also lets me take over the cooking when I have that urge because I need to do something in my day other than feeding a baby.

These very small accomplishments are what has kept me grounded these past few weeks—journaling as much as I possibly can, eating nutritional meals regularly, prepping lunch for myself when I can, enjoying cups of mushroom coffee in the morning, taking strolls with a baby strapped to my chest, getting out of the house when Theo allows it. Robert and I spent this past Sunday working in my kitchen garden, and while I wasn’t able to accomplish much as Theo was strapped into his carrier for the duration of our garden time, Robert was there to support and complete all my tasks so I can have some sort of garden to escape to this summer.

SIMPLE AND COMFORTING

My time at the kitchen island is scarce right now, and on those days where I’ve decided to conserve a frozen postpartum meal (because I need to get my hands working in my space again), I’ll rely on super simple, perfectly comforting dishes or a combo of both. I know some people would be so happy of having their kitchen duties stripped from them, but for me? Kitchen work is a form of meditation, so I seek those moments to keep me from spinning. Prep work is one of the most soothing things I can do in my day, so it’s no surprise that I keep finding myself at the cutting board throughout the week.

A go-to lately—pans of roasted carrots. I’m assuming there’s a postpartum need there because I’ve eaten simple roasted carrots nearly every day since giving birth.

And my next go to: a simple boiled, but beautiful and flavorful whole chicken. We’re not trying to win any awards here or break the Internet with some wild new recipe. Rather, I’m leaning into a simple childhood staple, one that’s simple to make, versatile and rather economical.

YES, A BOILED CHICKEN

Here’s what I’ve enjoyed with a simple boiled chicken since giving birth—a very zingy, fresh (no mayo) chicken salad (recipe below), smoky shredded chicken (which was used to make chicken tacos). Even my very first meal after Theo’s arrival featured, you guessed it, boiled chicken—ginger chicken and rice. And if I told you there’s another chicken boiling on my stove as I type this post, you wouldn’t believe me, but it’s true! And while I have no real plans for this particular batch, I do find it best to just have one on hand as it makes cooking so much easier, especially at this current stage in life.

Quick update: I wrote this post in two sittings: sitting 1) pre-lunch while Theo was napping and sitting 2) post-lunch where Theo skipped a nap session, and another session and then had a full blown melt down during our afternoon walk, and, after many failed attempts at soothing, little man is attached to me in his carrier, and we’re back at the breakfast table, after having cleaned a chicken with him tightly strapped on my chest. Let us hope he sleeps for another hour…

It’s no wonder my love for boiled chicken exists, especially during this journey where all I’m seeking are meals of simplicity and comfort. A boiled chicken is a true comfort for me. It was a dish on rotation in our house growing up. The chicken was mainly used to eat alongside my favorite Egyptian meal, and perhaps my overall favorite dish in general, Molokhia, a green slimy soup made using the leaves of Jute Mallow, broth, garlic, onion and spices. It traditionally eaten with crunchy pita, a big bowl of rice and, you guessed it, boiled chicken. At least that’s how my family does it. The boiled chicken broth was also used for the soup and anything extra was frozen for later use, which is another perk of this rather basic dish.

Today’s batch of chicken included anything I could find in my pantry and fridge—whole coriander seeds, black peppercorns, one lemon, fresh marjoram and sage, salt and floppy celery that’s been sitting in the veggie crisper for a little too long. One ingredient I don’t have right now, but always, always include in every broth and every batch of boiled chicken is cardamom pods, which, turns out, was a staple in my Taeta’s (grandmother) chicken broth as well. Another one of those traditions passed down through genes and not by being told.

I even left a bit of the fat on the chicken for extra flavor, but feel free to trim all of that off if that’s not your thing.

To boil the chicken: place all your stock ingredients, a whole washed chicken, those chicken innards and filtered water in a stock pot. Bring the contents to a rolling boil, reduce heat and simmer until chicken is done. The longer you cook, the more tender your chicken. If you cook it for too long, it can be a pain to clean off the bone. Just a little bit of advice.

Once your chicken has cooked and cooled, remove the chicken from the pot and clean every last bit off the bones. I like to store mine in a large covered bowl in the fridge for later use. And now all you have to figure out is how to use your perfectly cooked chicken.

ALL THAT REMAINS: MOIST, TENDER CHICKEN

This staple kitchen recipe for a simple way to prep chicken is one I plan on including in my cookbook, which has been in the works for two years now. More on that later…

In the book I have two easy recipes to share on how you can use your chicken chunks and bits. In this post, I’ll give you a delightful, very warm weather friendly chicken salad that is nothing like the Southern mayo heavy salad we’re all familiar with. This one uses fresh ingredients, flavorful spices and a lot of lemon (two ways!) for extra flavor.

CHICKEN SALAD WITH PRESERVED LEMON & CAPERS

INGREDIENTS:

1 whole chicken, boiled and shredded
4 cloves garlic, minced
3 stalks celery, finely chopped
2-3 Tbsp capers
Kalamata olives, pitted and torn
1 whole preserved lemon, minced
1 lemon, juice and zest
2 tsp coriander seeds, ground
2 Tbsp fresh mint, finely chopped
4 Tbsp fresh dill, finely chopped
salt to taste
a lot of black pepper
1/4 C vinegar (white wine, rice, apple cider or a combo)
1/4-1/2 C olive oil

INSTRUCTIONS:

1. Prep all your ingredients. Combine everything except the vinegar(s) and olive oil in a large bowl. Using a large spoon or rubber spatula, stir everything together until well combined.

2. Add in your vinegar(s) and mix again. Add in your olive oil and give it a final stir to coat. Place in the fridge for at least one hour to allow the flavors to meld before serving.